there once was a girl named hazel.

really digging hazel meyer’s stuff… can’t remember how I stumbled upon her (and it wasn’t with stumbleupon), but either way, she’s incredible.
she's a canadian based artist, out of montreal, and sometimes toronto (if i understand correctly). having worked in the textile design industry previously, her work is heavily influenced by textiles, and they often play a large role in her work. i love her committment to participatory work, and her love of conceptual art.
her CV is impressive to say the VERY least. involved in currated shows, panel talks, with a bachelors and masters in fine arts, she's definitely leading the way in textile art.
some of my favourites from hazel....
a few pieces of hazel's work - including 'no theory no cry' and 'know when to punch'
knitdown svp fringe dingdong necklace from hazel's etsy shop
delve into her work. i'm enthralled with it all.

love and creativity

my dear friend and i spent hours on a sunday, 2 weekends ago talking about the future, ourselves, our friendship, relationships, love, fate, trust, and all of those things that can't be predicted or planned - much to my dismay. we spoke about our futures and what they probably held, and what we hoped they held, and what we're both doing to pave our way.
image from weheartit.com/
her and i stay close in touch (a full 'i have a friend' blog post on the wonderful incredible woman i can proudly call my friend, Stephanie, coming soon), and we have been churning over several things via facebook and email in the days following this past conversation, even though she is now back across the pond (single tear).
then, i received this message from steph a couple of days ago: "so, you have cursed me. this 20 best twenty (small plug - read 20 best twenty here!)... on it every day. oh mercy. and i found this new blog i love... first of all, she is one of the most stunning people and i just read her story about how she met the man of her dreams... please read..."
so i did - because i'm never one to turn down a recommendation from steph. and it's a great story - about following your heart, and trusting that sometimes timing isn't always the worst thing in the world, if you just let it do what it needs to do (despite what my experience has shown).
image from weheartit.com/
there are so many things about our life paths that are confusing, frustrating, tumultuous, endearing, and all of the emotions that inspire words that don't resonate with you until you experience them... and i have. experienced all of them. but there was one thing - something that jumped at me. something that left the page with me, and made me think longer... i pulled from jenni's story, a note she wrote to herself on a personal (private) blog in the midst of her fairy tale romance...
uno momento - hold on. you all know me. i don't believe in fairy tale romances, love stories, or any of those things. to be clear, when i read this, it meant to me so many things about my career, friendships, family, emotions, and my relationship with myself, that i had to share.
this one thing that she remembered, and that she trusted...
"I have learned to listen to my heart. I have learned that if you never make room for better things and better ways to be, if you never clear out the things in your life that stand in the way of your happiness, then you are not aligning your universe to allow for amazing things. In this life, you don’t find yourself. You create yourself. And the same goes for love: you don’t find love, you create a road for love to travel and wait for it to come."

i do believe in love. i believe in loving my friends - and that means showing and telling them as often as possible. i believe in loving my family - through thick and thin, no matter who or what seems to step in the way. i believe in loving food - respecting where it comes from, and the amazing things we are exposed to every day, which is a privilege. i believe in loving movies - finding unknown movies that serve as the dreams of their film makers, and pouring over their every details, and loving even those movies that we feel we should be embarrassed to love. i believe in loving music - loving any kind of music i want, loving rap, hip-hop- pop, country, soul, jazz, rock, and everything in believe. i believe in loving strangers - loving their idiosyncrasies, their faults, unknowns, and their smiles and laughs. i believe in loving men - men who have taught me things, and men who i have been in relationships with, and what they brought to my life, and who they left me as.
but perhaps most importantly, i believe in loving myself. i believe in loving my mind - loving it enough to spend time on putting things into it on a daily basis, and giving it an outlet to let things out on a daily basis. i believe in loving my body - and that means what i do to it, and what i put into it. i believe in loving my personality - learning that who i am is who i am, and if people don't like it, then they're missing out on the real me. I believe in loving the things that i love - and being ok with loving those things... and not ashamed of them.
i write this blog for a lot of reasons, but have only recently realized that people read it. and whether that's a great thing, or a scary thing, it's part of the reason that we all write. so then, in reading jenni's blog further, she posted this quote:
“Everything in life is writable about if you have the outgoing guts to do it, and the imagination to improvise. The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt.”- Sylvia Plath
image from weheartit.com/
image from weheartit.com
not only is it one of my favourite poets of all time, but it meant so much. my creativity is starting to become a huge cornerstone of my life right now, and i'm only now learning to embrace and reflect on this... and the only thing standing in my way on the path is my personal self doubt - in regards to how my creativity will progress, how my creativity will present itself, and how my creativity will end up.
image from weheartit.com/
so, for now, i'm taking self-doubt down, and just doing it. because, "you don’t find love, you create a road for love to travel and wait for it to come"... and without that thing standing in the way, i'm making a road, and using all my guts to do it.

my (homecoming) weekend in summary

Though this weekend was an expected blur of friends and visiting, I am lucky to have so many great people in my life – so I can’t complain one bit about how EXHAUSTED I am today because of it….
up close and personal with my little monkey (a week and 3 days old); staring contest with auntie jamie; my 4th little monkey (and 5th in total!) snuggling all night long.
Friday: since I had a meeting with clients in waterloo, I was already there without the Friday afternoon drive. It was GREAT to not have to battle traffic on a Friday afternoon on the highways getting out of Toronto. I met up with karli and sean, and got a few things with them, as they had just moved into their brand new house (exciting!). we waited on Alex (another friend who we donned with at university), and then got a tour of the new abode. We then went out for dinner – to one of our favourite places in waterloo (which is actually the first place I had real Indian food) masala bay. the best part about waterloo? Seeing university professors in the restaurants, who you had crushes on, and realizing you are becoming closer and closer to their age. So. Weird. Dinner was, as always, amazing, and filling. And I have lovely friends who are always willing to eat vegan with me. We then headed back to sean and karli’s place, where we settled in for our typical bambino (it’s our bk-heart thing), and watched ‘bridesmaids’. This led to a quasi intervention, in which I was toted as the Kristen Wiig of the group… and that I need to get my life together. We then were up way too late watching sports highlights, and talking.
Saturday: slept in a bit, and then hung around the house watching taped episodes of ‘the view’, and chatting. I left when they left to move some of the last stuff over from the apartment, to head to the football game. Spent the football game chatting to old friends, and bumping into students (from when I was a don) – one of whom is engaged! – and catching up. I love homecoming for things like that. Then went to morty’s for lunch/dinner with a group of friends (new and old), and talked about international development, sports, and other good convo topics. Headed to a friend’s brother’s place, where we changed (probably should have napped), and danced, and had some drinks, before leaving for the bar. Since I was still in my football clothes, I had to do a quick stop at my car to get bar clothes. went to the turret - the on campus bar that reminds me purely of every week at university, where my roommates and i got into endless amounts of trouble. Ended up spending the night again talking to old friends, spending quality time with an ex boyfriend (who I have repaired bridges with – so nice to have the friendship back), and getting into plenty of trouble. 1 burrito, 1 long walk, a cab ride, and lots of laughs and smiling later, we ended up home and in bed at about 4am.
Sunday: woke up late to my friend’s brother making us smoothies. Sat around for a bit, before being dropped off at my car at around 2. Then went over to cait and matt’s, to visit with them and the unborn nugget for a couple of hours, before heading to my friend jamie’s place for a surprise celebration of her graduation, new job and birthday. Was nice to see all the parts of her life come together – loved that I was invited as well! After dinner, I scooted to dundas to see my little munchkins, and Stacie and Nathan, and spend some quality time with the newest monkey. I got a ton of cuddles from the little ones, and didn’t even notice when it was 10pm and I hadn’t even started driving home yet.
Hope everyone had a fantastic weekend – enjoying the last bits of summer/fall (summarall?) while we can still get away with being outside with no hats.