never... but maybe.

i'm not sure i ever believed in the institution of marriage. the idea of marrying for religion, other people, the occasion, the dress. i hate huge crowds, being the centre of attention, anything expensive, and white. i can't wear white.
i've written about marriage (and weddings) time and time again - the man i'll be with, not settling, being stubborn, and finding the man who combines all my loves into one (and not letting him break my heart).
then i look at marriages of the past. i think about those who married for war, for necessity... those who married because they had no choice, married men double their age. married for hatred, for peace, for family name, and history. and i can't figure out where love came into the picture.
from bhldn
then. when looking at photos of weddings of 'yesteryear' i find this. a moment of sheer joy in the face of someone... and it opens a mirror to the happiness that some will only find once. and some will never find.
so i guess, i'll admit it. i want that. the above-the-knees dress at a church, the lace gloves, and the excitement, and uncontrollable nature in me that most find annoying.
and. when i do end up wanting 'that' (the bad word), i'll DEFINITELY buy everything from this site. except for vintage decorations.




wedding dresses, headpieces, and bridesmaid dresses from BHLDN.

my idols.

i love these women.
yes. i've mentioned this before... and again. and again.
in 2007, they were on forbes 'richest 20 women in entertainment' list - worth $100 million at age 20 placing rank 11. on their 18th birthday in 2004, they successfully took over as joint CEOs of their company Dualstar Entertainment Group. Once they took control, they moved their market share from tweens, to teens by releasing perfumes and furniture (yes. i do have all of their perfumes). they've appeared in badgley mischka ads to 'adult' their image, and use as a real transition to their adult clothing lines.
MK & A at Elizabeth and James textile show (from http://mary-kateandashleyimages.com)
i love everything about their clothing lines - the row, and elizabeth and james - their statements, their actions, their business choices. for child stars (in relation to the amount of time they were in the spotlight), they've encountered very little drama - save for a stint in rehab for an eating disorder (explained by overworking), and some drama surrounding heath ledger's death - though they are loved by the media for their outrageous dressing.
their spring summer 2011 line for the row makes me wish i could wear these clothes alllll the time. their pre-fall line for the row is stunning, with leather skirts, and the exact same colour scheme as my closet.
they've also recently started a line at JC penney called 'olsenboye'... a lower priced fashion line. with incredible shoes.
any women who take control over their own lives and affairs, women who have to fight against the grain to do what they think is right, women who take risks to change things, women who follows their hearts and do what they feel is right, no matter what people tell them, women who understand the importance of family over anything else.... those are women i want to call heros.

just a moment of inspiration... and hope for the future. needing to be inspired lately.... so looking to my leaders... i guess i should read one of my copies of 'influence'

my weekend in summary

well. there we have it. another weekend.
friday: so, those of you who read my blog, and thought, "wow. health issues, then relationship issues, then broken back.... how much worse could it get for her!". friday when i walked out to my car, i found out. car broken into. window smashed, things stolen. LOVELY. so instead of my planned trip to go see a friend, i had to do all the great stuff when your car is broken into - call the police, get quotes on a brand new window, etc. i then went to meet a bunch of girls from work for celebratory drinks. i wasn't going to, but when i realized that i couldn't drive to my friends hockey game after all, i may as well enjoy a night out to get my mind off of things. despite a horrible waitress, and a lot too much wine, it was a great night of good friends, good conversation and laughs. though... the people on dates around us may not have appreciated the conversation, the later into the night it got.
saturday: woke up early (ish) to take my car to the dealership to be fixed. then headed to the subway station so i could meet a couple of friends. those friends kind enough to pick me up, and take pity on me for a drive to hang out and party. since i was supposed to be there for the weekend, it was nice to be able to at least go for a night. we arrived in time for a couple of the guys to play some pick up hockey, and then came home for dinner. we then headed out to a party for someone's bday. i think probably the first time i have ever seen a painted, plywood beer pong table. incredible. night filled with florida track suits, local small town bars, and a pregnancy anouncement. good stuff! despite the walk home at the end of the night - note to all: do not walk that far with a broken back.
sunday: we all woke up fairly early, and after our host, brad, took off to coach his hockey team, the rest of us hung out, and then left for home. once the guys dropped me off, i was restless and spent the day reorganizing all of my kitchen cupboards. yes. i did say that.
hope everyone had a great weekend!